Target Application Questionnaire – Worse Than Unicru

Yes, my friends and fellow readers, someone has finally one-upped Unicru. Today, I stopped by target to put in my curriculum vitae and they told me to come back after I completed their online application. They were very admate that I do this and essentially refused to listen to my complaint that I have done similar appllications in the past and they never work out. He told me that that was no other way around it and that I had to fill it out if I wanted to be applicable for an interview even though he “understood my grievances”. He also informed me that Target doesn’t use Unicru to process their applications, which is true.
If there is one thing this manager can be commended for is honesty. However, I know as well as anyone, that the these stores do have alternative application methods and they do take resumes — just not under normal circumstances. Many managers however are ignorant about this or don’t fully understand the process, but there are always way around the Unicru and similar systems. That being said, this beef isn’t with Unicru: it’s with Target plain and simple.

So just how much worse it the Target application? And Why? Well, I could tell you; however, that would not do justice to just how bad it really is, so I’m going to post the questions at the end of this page as an attachment just so you can see. In addition I will also quote some of the worst. It really is that bad, and just when you think the douchebaggery is over, it gets worse. This test just isn’t absolutely offensive: it is out-right discriminatory against personality types, political outlooks, disabilities, and general world veiws. It is more of a personality and archetype examination than a anything resembling a real qualification battery to place you into the “right” job.

Here are just a few of the questions on the Target Questionnaire too exemplify just how politically and socially motivated this test is:

On rebellion
Compared to others, I know I have a rebellious attitude:
1. Strongly agree     2. Slightly agree     3. Not sure/in-between     4. Slightly disagree     5. Strongly disagree

On Strategy:
I am:
1. Much more tactful than most     2. Slightly more tactful than most     3. About the same as most when it comes to tact     4. Slightly more direct than most     5. Much more direct than most

On “Traditional Values”:
Traditional values of my upbringing play an important role in my life:
1. Strongly agree     2. Slightly agree     3. Not sure/in-between     4. Slightly disagree     5. Strongly disagree

On Government and Authority:
The percentage of politicians that I think are honest is:
1. 95% to 100%     2. 90% to 94%     3. 75% to 89%     4. 50% to 74%     5. Less than 50%

On Tenure:
I have or will probably change jobs:
1. Quite often     2. Often     3. Sometimes     4. Rarely     5. Never

Useless personality question / false-dichotomy:
My close friends tell me I am:
1. Careful and serious-minded     2. Not sure/in-between     3. Carefree and happy-go-lucky

Question regarding work-ethic not based on reality:
Promotions at work are usually based on:
1. Effort or who tries the hardest     2. Ability or who has the most skill     3. Who has the most experience     4. Other factors like who the boss likes best     5. Luck or being in the right place at the right time

Question regarding social participation in High School:
During high school, the number of clubs or organizations I belonged/belong to is:
1. 0     2. 1     3. 2 to 3     4. 4 to 5     5. More than 5

Similar question regarding leadership:
The number of times I have been elected or named the leader of a group (e.g. team captain, spokesperson, chairperson, etc.) is:
1. 0     2. 1     3. 2 to 3     4. 4 to 5     5. More than 5

Trust question:
I find it easy to trust other people:
1. Yes     2. Not sure/in-between     3. No

Perception of successfulness:
Using your own idea of what success means, have you been successful to this point in your life?
1. Yes     2. Partly/not sure     3. No

Similar question:
Compared to most of my friends, I am:
1. Much less satisfied with my life     2. Slightly less satisfied with my life     3. About as satisfied with my life     4. Slightly more satisfied with my life     5. Much more satisfied with my life

False dichotomy:
I am more of a:
1. Logical thinker     2. Not sure/in-between     3. Day dreamer

More false dichotomies:
There are leaders and there are followers. Viewing myself as objectively as possible, I am:
1. Much more of a leader than a follower     2. Slightly more of a leader than a follower     3. About as much a leader as a follower     4. Slightly less a leader than a follower     5. Much less a leader than a follower

Philosophical / Metaphysical Question:
My experience with people has been that:
1. There is lot of good in all people     2. There is some good in most people     3. People are about as good as they have to be     4. A surprising number of people are mean and dishonest     5. Most people are just no good

Fact & figures question not actually asking the real number:
I believe that the percentage of the U.S. population that cheats when they fill out their federal tax returns is:
1. 10% or less     2. Less than 25%, but more than 10%     3. 25% to 50%     4. 51% to 75%     5. 76% or more

Financial question:
Regarding my savings habits, I:
1. Regularly save a set amount     2. Save when I get extra money     3. Do not save due to limited means

So it’s good to know that Target wants to employ people who are not honest about the real world around them, can ignore the facts, and place themsleves into false dichotomies where both is possible. You have to wonder how they are going to interepret the fact that most politicians aren’t honest, 1/3 of Americans do cheat on their taxes (roughly around 35%), and most people support traditional values.
The fct that this kind of quackery testing is upheld in the corporate world just proves how out of touch Wall Street is with the American people. These tests due nothing but discriminate against the common person and the intelligent person alike and is basically an insult to both’s intellect.

Target Questionnaire

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7 Comments

  1. thedrudgery said,

    The test does suck, but I find it odd that you use “curriculum vitae”, and “beef” in the same paragraph, that you misused “due” and misspelled “adamant”.

  2. Will Black said,

    As you said, they want people who live in make believe since they can probably be easily worked, or manipulated and probably wont stand up for themselves if they get into a situation. I just did one of those; and couldn’t resist the urge to answer honestly. (and i did put 25-50% on the tax thing; cant help when you see stories about celebs who cheat, and people on American Greed)

  3. regulusseradly said,

    I actually managed to get through it pretty easily the first time I did, after having been auto-rejected by the questionnaire at Sears two days earlier. I ended up being one of their best employees at my level, particularly in Food Service which seemed to be beyond the grasp of many. I had my former girlfriend to coach me… she who got hired at Sears and quit within the week due to the ‘anxiety’.

  4. Footlocker Photos said,

    Just took the test today…saw some questions similar to yours but most were different.

  5. I'm really getting tired of online job applications - Android Forums said,

    […] […]

  6. Abby Buell said,

    haha, I just completed this application. It’s RIDICULOUS, and SO transparent! Obviously, I answered all of the questions withe the answers they want to hear – not the truth 🙂

  7. Citizen Shane said,

    Here’s another false-dichotomy for you (and yes, target IS off their rocker, thanks for the noticing):

    “Which adjective BEST describes you at work?:

    1.Punctual
    2.Graceful”

    Seriously? What is graceful – is it a euphemism for “fashionably late?” Can’t I be graceful AND punctual at the same time? Does that mean I’m only graceful about my tardiness? Wth. Brought to you by Unicru

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